Bad Poetry: Style Invitational Limericks

I woke up early this morning having a terrible time with the Washington Post Style Invitational's limerick challenge. The Post provided seven matter-of-fact lines taken from news stories, some imperfect for the last line of a limerick, in need of a short connecting word like "and" or "said."

[link]

I kept thinking of limericks where the last lines were just a little bit different from those provided.

Limericks and haiku often occur to me in series that form longer pieces of Bad Poetry. This one seemed to want to become a novel. It doesn't sound like a novel I particularly want to write. Youall may, of course, write it if you so choose:

Buying books, albums, game box, and tile,

Then booking a tour of the Nile,

With her new husband’s credit,

She posted on Reddit,

“I just like to do things in ‘Style’!”

At the sight of which he dropped his comb

(Exposing his shiny bald dome),

And all through the hotel

They heard her husband yell,

“Can somebody please take me home?”

“What’s the problem?” she said. “Please explain,”

As the cab swept him off toward the train.

Turned out he’d given Sonny

Control of his money,

And she never saw him again.

(For those who don't get it: Many readers' favorite section of the Washington Post, the one with the lowest levels of alarm and despondency, is called "Style." In addition to the Invitational joke contests it has been known to contain advice columns; magazine-length articles; society and fashion news; reviews of books, games, and music; and travel pieces, when there's not a separate "Travel" section.)

Obviously the limerick sequence was not about the Trumps, whom Gene Weingarten's sample limerick had brought to mind. It's about a fictional couple who look like them. Nevertheless. We are talking about Washington. One of the suggested lines did ask for a roast of some President. 

A nerdy young lawyer’s street cred

Can bring Marxism back from the dead,

And in some urban scene

Is a way to be Green...

Well, that’s what the last President said.

And this one impartially bashes neither...

To spare you unnecessary drama:

New book “Pedophiles, Trump, and Obama”

Will not help denigrate

The one you love to hate:

Note strategically placed Oxford comma.

Amazon link? What about the Father of the Limerick?