Wednesday, August 2, 2023

A Job I Wouldn't Be Good At

Well, this Long & Short Reviews prompt ought to be good for a short answer. A job I wouldn't be good at? 

Click here to see the links to other people's posts. 

There are dozens, but since I've already mentioned my astigmatism, dyslexia, non-athleticism, and femaleness, I think one job I'd do badly enough to make the idea funny is Sports Announcer. 

"...aaaand here is the Writer Known as Priscilla King filling in as the Voice of the Blue Devils, commenting on the Friday night football game between Gate City and Abingdon." 

The school song is played by a brass band while the various Blue Devils run out and wave to their fans. As usual the stands are well filled on the Gate City side, not at all well filled on the visitors' side, because people don't drive fifty miles to watch high school games. Gate City football fans like to make a lot of noise on the local radio and TV reports of games. They scream, clap, stomp, and clang cowbells. 

"Starting tonight we have quarterback John Doe, a senior, 5'10" and 160 pounds. If they say so, I suppose. Here comes fullback Richard Roe, a junior, 6' tall and 128 pounds."

"Er um, Writer, I'm sure that's 182 pounds."

"Yes? So it is. Now I'm starting to pay attention to my dyslexic mistakes, which usually means I make more of them. Here comes Lilly May Roe..."

"That would be Billy Ray Moe."

"Oh sorry! Billy Ray Moe, mophosore..."

"Priscilla, what are you drinking?"

"Coffee! Plain coffee! What'd I say? Billy Ray Moe, 1'60", weighs 510 pounds..."

"Sorry folks! I am now filling in as the Voice of the Blue Devils as the writer known as Priscilla King will be spending the rest of the game monitoring the equipment in the sound booth..."

Well, perhaps you readers, like the hypothetical grandparents of the hypothetical Billy Ray Moe, don't think there's anything funny about this sketch, but I chortled while writing it. 

11 comments:

  1. This was funny for sure. Yeah, I wouldn’t know anything about sports announcing either. :)

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  2. This made me chuckle. It's not even a job that crossed my mind, but I s'pose someone has to do the announcing.🤣

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  3. Well, I'm sure that Milly Bay Roe appreciates your efforts!

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    1. I'm glad no real families in my town use Doe, Roe, or Moe as names!

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  4. Sounds funny enough to watch a game just to listen to the announcing!

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  5. Haha, I love how you took this prompt and ran with it! A sports announcer is definitely not for me, lol. I can't even imagine! I also have dyslexia and astigmatism. 💕

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    1. Interesting that so many people who love reading and writing have one or both, isn't it?

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  6. Thanks to all who visited and chuckled!

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  7. That gave me a good giggle, thank you!

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