Tortie Tuesday: Samantha's First Interview

Samantha, Junior Resident Cat, likes thinking she’s the new Queen of the Cat Sanctuary. Little does she know that a Queen Cat has duties, such as responding to e-friends’ blogs, like http://www.mochasmysteriesmeows.com/2018/01/20-more-amazing-facts-about-mudpie.html ...

(There really ought to be a photo of Samantha here, but she's not posed for one yet, so instead, here's another Amazon link to a blank book. This book is recommended, by its cover, as a gift for anyone who wants to keep a diary using a notebook with a tortoiseshell kitten on the cover.)

Click here...

Q. What was the last thing you put in your mouth?

A. Kibble.

Q. Where was your picture taken?

A. In the front yard.

Q. Worst pain you ever felt?

A. Eating a half-dead bird. How can anything that smells so much like chicken be so sickening?

Q. Favorite place you’ve traveled?

A. Up to the spring with my human.

Q. How late did you stay up last night?

A. What kind of question is that? Adolescent cats catnap during the day and night, but never really go to bed!

Q. If you could move, where to?

A. I liked my kittenhood home, but the others there didn’t like me.

Q. What do you collect?

A. Admirers.

Q. Which of your blogging friends lives the closest?

A. Probably the cats at the Little Bookstore of Big Stone Gap. (That's the link for the blog, and here's the link for the book: The Little Bookstore of Big Stone Gap.)

Q. Amusement park or concert?

A. Urgh! Ick! Neither.

Q. When was the last time you cried?

A. Yesterday when my human walked up the road calling for Heather. Why does she think I need an older cat to guide me? Why can’t she see that I’m a Purrfect Queen Cat in my own right? I’m nine months old already! I know everything! Meowwww!

Q. Who took your photo?

A. Nobody has, yet.

Q. Who’s the last person you took a picture with?

A. I've not, yet.

Q. What’s your favorite season?

A. I don’t remember much about spring, but everyone makes it sound more fun than winter.

Q. If you could have any career, what would it be?

A. Cat.

Q. Do you think relationships are ever worth it?

A. Worth what? I’ve never made any sacrifice for anything.

Q. If you could talk to anyone right now, who would it be?

A. Heather’s nephew Burr. The humans like Heather’s son Tickle better, but Burr appreciates me more. I don’t think Tickle ever completely got over that cat they called Inky. Burr has never been in love before.

(Q. Burr has the weak form of a very bad gene; he's the only one of his mother's kittens who's still living. Are you aware of a possibility of surgical operations in his or your future?

A. I don’t care! It’s not all about sex with social cats. Burr still adores me when I’m not in heat. Well, maybe partly because I share my food with him. Heather said her uncle Damian used to come up to visit, when the human children and dogs got on his nerves at home, just to hang out with some nice ladycats for a change, and they used to make the human feed him along with them. So when I can, which isn’t always, I step away from food and make her feed Burr.)

Q. Are you a good influence?

A. Of course I am! I show the others that they have a right to defend themselves from threats like being reached across, to run in through a door while a human is shouting “No!”, and to make up their own minds about coming when called...

Q. Does pineapple belong on pizza?

A. If the humans eat it, that’s all the more meat, cheese, and bread for the cat, right? I only wish this human ever ate pizza. My original humans did. About the only good thing this one eats is chicken and rice. Mostly she eats yucky things that only humans like, like oranges, nuts, and tomatoes. Even dogs know that green plants are strictly to chew on when we feel sick, but this human eats them as if they were kibble.

Q. You have the remote, what are you watching?

A. Behind the TV in case something scuttles out from the baseboard. Probably only a nasty little bug with an odor I won’t want to have on my paw, but you never know. (Yes, that's a Wikipedia link to the kind of bugs that infest private homes in Scott County, Virginia. The kind that are so nasty that in some English-speaking countries "bug" is considered a rude word have been reported, so far, only in the government-funded housing project. The kind that infest computer programs and web sites...what would a kitten know? Actually the Cat Sanctuary doesn't have a TV set, but Samantha's original home had one.)

Q. Who do you think will play along with these cat interviews?

A. I don’t know or even really care. Burr is the first real friend I’ve ever had. Heather was kind to me, but I don’t get all this wanting to have a friend stuff. That cat was so far gone on having friends, she wouldn’t even wash her own face if she could help it. Where did she get the idea that cats are supposed to have friends? My mother always told me that it was every cat for herself in this world.