Bad Poetry: Delusions

Next to the day when a patient actually died, the most melodramatic day in my not-if-I-can-help-it home nursing career was the day a patient had a psychotic reaction to a change in medication. The patient's husband couldn't imagine how a doctor could even think of his sensible wife as psychotic. "She is having delusions." 

"What are you talking about?"

"Delusions, sir, means that she believes things that aren't true."

"Believes things that aren't true? Why, then, tell me who's not having delusions?" The old gentleman started listing public figures who were in the news that year. "Do those two serial divorcees believe that whatever they have is a marriage, or ever will be? Does that candidate believe he has a chance to win the election?"

The patient stabilized in a few days and went home, practical and wise as ever. In a week or so I was free to go back to the city and take care of business, and there I wrote a song about delusions. I've sung it different ways, reflecting different news stories, over the years. The verses below stick in my mind as having seemed relevant in most years.

See the famous aging actress getting “married” once again.

Do you believe she’s ever going to stand by just one man?

Do you believe he wants more than her money and her fame?

Do you believe she can even remember her new “married name”?

Delusions, oh, delusions, we all have them, yes we do.

Delusions, oh, delusions—I believe that I can sing.

Delusions, oh, delusions, we all lose contact once in a while.

Turn on the news and wonder if “reality” means anything!

See the eager college student burn the candle at both ends:

Class overload, work overtime, two jobs, clubs, church, and friends.

By senior year, in coffee this poor child has lost all hope.

Another kid says, “Friend, I know where you can get some dope."

Delusions, oh, delusions, meth-heads don’t know they’re addicts too.

Delusions, oh, delusions, and I don’t know that I can’t sing!

Delusions, oh, delusions, we all lose contact once in a while.

Turn on the news and wonder if “reality” means anything!

See the crowd of unknown “hopefuls” trying to run for President.

“Political experience”—did they ever know what that meant?

Do you believe any of them think they’ll have a chance to win,

Or are they trying to spoil the race for someone who is “in”?

Delusions, oh, delusions, everybody has a few.

Delusions, oh, delusions, whoa! I believe that I can sing!

Delusions, oh, delusions, we all lose contact once in a while.

Turn on the news and wonder if “reality” means anything!

See the topical folk song writer sitting in this hotel room.

Can you believe she thinks a song will help dispel the gloom?

Can you believe she thinks that facing reality does any good?

As delusions go, that’s not so bad; I’d believe it if I could.

Delusions, oh, delusions, everybody has a few.

Delusions, oh, delusions—do I believe that I can sing?

Delusions, oh, delusions, we all lose contact once in a while.

Turn on the news and wonder if “reality” means anything!