Tuesday, October 11, 2022

Tortie Tuesday: Serena on Property Rights

For new visitors: "Interviews" with animals are a theme at this web site. They're based on the animals' observed behavior. I write them in a sober, but whimsical, state of mind. 

Serena started out looking like this:


Then she grew bigger: about twelve pounds of dense bone and sturdy muscle. She has never been fat.  She's not at all the calm, serene, sit-by-the-fire sort of cat who is usually called Serena--more like big, strong, athletic and motherly Serena Williams. This web site has displayed a few pictures of her as an adult, but only in the background, because she sees cameras as something in the soccer ball family. She is the mother of Silver, currently three and a half years old, and Crayola and Pastel, currently seven months old. Sommersburr is an ancient neutered male social cat who hangs out with them for part of almost every day; he's probably some sort of cousin, and helped baby-sit the kittens.

PK: "Serena, now that I have regular access to the Internet, I've been at least following if not participating in a poetry group. They recently challenged themselves to write two short poems about the same thing from different points of view. This was one of the pairs of poems:


(Note: In real life I don't read poems or chatter idly with Serena. If you notice that an animal is paying attention and learning words, what you say to that animal needs to be clear, simple, and relevant to the animal's immediate needs and behavior. Serena does more "talking" than listening but she does understand English.)

Serena: "I wish your human friends wrote their poems on paper. Paper is useful--unlike that Lap Pooper."

PK: "Why do you dislike the laptop computer so? Do you see your reflection in it and think it's a rival Queen Cat? Or do you have that 'electromagnetic sensitivity some of our e-friends have been talking about?"

Serena: "I don't know. What I know is that you're my human. Nobody else belongs in your lap, or even on your workbench."

(The 15" laptop has to sit beside me on the bench because it's too big to fit into the space for the laptop on the desk.)

PK: "Well, you are a jealous cat. I suppose it runs in your family. Mackerel brought the rest of his family to me and encouraged them to purr and cuddle, all in order and for just a few minutes each. He let his sister Polly chew on me because Polly was a baby Queen Cat just as you were, but if any other cat was disrespectful or familiar with me, Mac sent them rolling head over heels. 

Polly never seemed jealous; she started the tradition of mother cats curling up against me or on my lap while nursing their kittens. Of her three daughters, though, Mogwai was possessive--anybody else could sit on my right shoulder, but Mogwai thought she owned my left shoulder--and poor Bisquit, in between the lifetimes of Spot and Candice, was hardly ever petted because if anyone cuddled her for two minutes she'd start hissing and slapping other cats away from that human. She became more sensible as Candice grew up.

In the next generation, the five tortie (three-colored, predominantly black) and calico (three-colored, predominantly white) cats seemed to share everything. They were a team. The three who survived into middle age had a very clear division of responsibilities; Ivy's job was communicating with humans, Heather's was providing and protecting, and Irene's was bringing up kittens--all kittens born to them, and some kittens that weren't. They didn't hiss, yowl, slap, or even growl, but in their official pictures you could see Heather looking miffed and Irene rolling her eyes because they hadn't been petted first. They were polite sisters but just a little bit competitive about being petted. They were incredibly generous about bringing up kittens, but the minute a kitten broke their rules, they placed that kitten at a neighbor's house. Their rules included that kittens were not allowed to bond with me. That was why Sisawat, who took so long finding a Purrmanent Home, never was a pet even though she had such a lovable purrsonality. The only exception was their foster kitten Inky. After Inky defended younger kittens from a predator, she was allowed to snuggle up to me as much as she wanted.

Then Heather adopted your mother. The next spring you were born and immediately took over. You didn't seem to mind when I petted your mother, or your adoptive brother Traveller, but you always glare if I pet one of your kittens. Why?"

Serena: "Because I'm the Queen Cat. I was born in the office room. No other cat lived here except my wimpy little mother, who moved in with my father and his humans as soon as he told her it was safe. That left me in charge of things, being the only competent person on the place. I own this house and its humans and other associated lifeforms."

PK: "Most humans think that a 'competent person' always means a human. Many humans don't even think of cats as being persons."

Serena: "Well, what can be expected from poor dumb animals. Of course some humans are smarter than others. You at least have enough sense to understand most of what I say to you. Still, at the end of the day, you can't even catch your own mice. But that's all right, as long as we're here to look after you."

PK: "Yes, well, from my point of view, you certainly are a blessing. For one thing most cat blogs grow dull because most cats don't do much. Normal cats eat, they sleep, they would reproduce if they weren't sterilized, and that's about all there is to their lives. Social cats' relationships with one another make you much more interesting animal companions for a writer. And it is nice to see friendly faces watching for me to come into the yard or out onto the porch. Also hunting as a team makes it much easier to prevent mice chewing up everything in the house and the house on top of that."

Serena: "Yes? What else do you like about me?"

PK: "If it were possible for you to be more full of yourself than you are, you just might be human. Still, you're not as conceited as some humans are and you have more to be conceited about. But why don't you want me to bond with your kittens?"

Serena: "Well, you saw what happened with Burly. You petted and played with him a little, that winter when he was a lonely only kitten. I played with him too. Next thing we knew, he was challenging my title to my own home. He even told me not to snuggle up to you!"

PK: "You never did much of that. I've never seen a house cat as un-cuddly as you."

Serena: "Well I'm not soppy about it. I don't want to sit on your lap and get my coat saturated with human odors. But it most definitely is my right and responsibility to make sure other cats can tell by a sniff that you belong to me!"

PK: "Jealousy is something other people have observed in social cats. (Mostly social cats are nicer than normal cats, but not all of them are perfect fur angels!) Sometimes cats who resent one another will 'mark their territory' the way dogs do. At a Cat Sanctuary near us, Queen Cat Rue 'marks' all around the dominant human's feet if the human talks to other cats, talks to humans, or even works in the garden. Worse than living with a dog, I'd think that would be."

Serena: "Count your blessings, then. I'm the biggest and oldest cat here, except for Sommersburr, and if I think other cats are too close to you I can slap them."

PK: "What about sharing my lap and just accepting that I love the whole family of you? That you'd be special to me in any case because you spent your early life in the office, but you're more special because other cats like and respect you."

Serena: "They'd respect me less if I didn't hold on to my position as Queen Cat. Like Burly. Little Crayola is already trying to be cuter than I am, and just see if Pastel doesn't get above herself when she's grown a little bigger. Anyway it's a question of natural rights. You belong to me by birthright and you shouldn't even want to pay attention to other cats. Or dogs. Or Lap Poopers."

PK: "Does this have anything to do with all those families where the humans feel that the dogs worship them and the cats think of them as domestic help?"

Serena: "How could it not? In those families the dog claims the human as its property so, if they're going to live together in peace, the cat would have to keep a distance from the human out of respect for the dog."

PK: "Could people verify this? I know status in a social cat community is a reason why some cats keep a distance from some people, because in times of transition between Queen Cats the other cats have become much friendlier with me."

Serena: "It would be easy to verify! Just get rid of the dog."

PK: "People in that sort of household usually bond with their dogs. That would be like telling me to get rid of you--unthinkable! No, they'd have to wait until the dog needed to spend some time with the vet, or one of the children moved out and took the dog along."

Serena: "How can anyone bond with anything that smells like a dog and makes dog noises? Humans are bad enough, in both of those categories, for anybody!"

PK: "You've only ever encountered stray dogs. Pet dogs tend to become the way most humans think all good pets should be. They seem to worship their humans. They want to do whatever the humans tell them. They may or may not be intelligent enough to remember what words mean, but they cry when their humans have to remind them. Dogs that are the least bit like you are big enough to be dangerous and often find themselves in shelters."

Serena: "Like ME?!"

PK: "Like you--rough, tough, bossy. You're not at all like most people's idea of a beloved pet cat. You don't purr. You don't snuggle. With a whole orchard to sharpen your claws in, you sharpen them on the office door. If you were a dog, you'd be a pit bull. I've never been sure whether your mother moved in with Burr because Burr didn't want to have to walk so far to hang out with her, or because she was starting to feel scared of you. I still love you, even though you push the limits, regularly. Would you like a drink of water before I go back to the computer?"

Serena: "Of course we'd all like a drink of water. This water tastes different from the water we drank earlier this summer."

PK: "Yes. The company changed the mineral content after people got into a discussion about it on Twitter and said it tasted bitter. Pure Life water now has a cleaner, fresher taste more like our local spring water, because they add magnesium. Do you like the magnesium better than the sodium they used to add?"

Serena: "It's water. We drink it to cool down, and because it's something we can share with you.:"

PK: "I'm glad you find it drinkable, unlike town water, to which they add chlorine. Now let's look for some other cats who need homes of their own, where you won't be jealous of them...it's a Tortie Tuesday, but because this is an unlucky month for black cats let's try to find some  diluted' Torties, or grayzel-colored cats."

1. Penny from Staten Island 


Penny is a spring kitten. An older photo at her web page shows her teaching a litter mate how to open a wrapped treat. The text no longer says anything about her siblings so they may already have found purrmanent homes, leaving Penny behind. She is described as friendly and clever, comfortable with other cats and even with children. 

2. Sushi from Cambridge 

Sushi's looks seem to be the most unusual thing about her. If she's more than a spring kitten, she's not much more. She's described as shy at first, but appreciative of any attention she's offered. She's been spayed and vaccinated. 

3. Tootsie from Sautee Nacoochee 


What a glamorous coat! She's a "blotched" tabby, with large patches of color that form swirls on her sides, rather than the usual "mackerel" tabby, with little stripes. Tootsie is described as another nice normal kitten, friendly, playful. She's had all the required veterinary care. What makes her special besides her coat, are her siblings. She was one of a large litter and can be adopted along with some of the other kittens in the group. 
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