Friday, April 15, 2016

Funny Fantasy Football Shirts

(Blogjob tags: comic T-shirt imagesfantasy footballfunny football shirtsindividual designs for T-shirtsNFL starssports souvenirs. I later learned that the client had complained to the agent that he'd wanted more different links. Sorry, Mike, you get what you pay for; this is $5 worth of online research.)

Here's a guest post I wrote for another site, by which it was rejected...so, just to make sure the reasons didn't include plagiarism, the whole world gets to know what I wrote. Does it belong in the "Crafts" category? Of course! Designing T-shirts is a craft!
The site was about fantasy football. For those who may not be familiar with this sport, here's our Amazon book link:
Yes, you can actually Google "funny sports shirts," or "funny football shirts," or (fill in the blanks). If you're not too busy Twittering, you can even search the Net for funny football shirt designs during commercial breaks in a game. Or, if you think your web site really needs to consider this fascinating topic, you might spend an hour or two searching for the shirts that make you chortle.
Your results may vary. One reason for that is that people can interpret the word "funny," and even the word "football," in different ways. This article is, for obvious reasons, primarily about football in the NFL-fantasy sense.
Also, it's about shirts that are funny in the sense that someone who's not even a serious football fan would be likely to smile upon seeing these shirts. Some football shirts are funny to people who share a certain memory or attitude. There's nothing wrong with that, but these shirts are funny to someone who, if invited to draft a fantasy football team, is likely to start with Steve Young, Jerry Rice, and Doug Williams--it's a fantasy, so why can't they be on the same team with the Mannings, Brett Favre, and Tim Tebow? (At the fantasy football site I wouldn't have needed to explain...fantasy football is played by drafting a team of current players and then comparing their current performances.)
First, the Fantasy-Specific Football Shirts.
"Don't drink and draft fantasy football." Draft your team first! Any drinking buddies who don't get this have had too many and should switch to coffee now. These shirts come in a wide range of sizes, styles, and colors; if your friends like this message, there's a different, individual look for everyone. The link shows a white, 100% cotton, high-end man's shirt style. Long sleeves, short sleeves, cheaper shirts, ringers, hoodies, even a woman's stretch-to-fit polyester-blend shirt, and 41 colors, are also available.
"Fantasy football: it's not a game." Someone who really wants to talk to you can always ask, "Then what is it?" Other people can just smile at the novelty of a shirt message that's not advertising a product. This shirt comes in a lighter weight, finer grade of cotton than the standard T-shirt, in six "unisex" adult sizes and twenty different colors.
"Don't act like you're not impressed with my team (FFL)." Fellow fantasy football fans will get it. People who aren't fantasy football fans can ask you to explain it. This shirt comes in a heavy, durable grade of cotton, in five "men's" sizes and fifteen colors.
For high school footballers who still have the muscles, even if you use them in boring grown-up ways now...
Zazzle will print this motif on men's, women's, or children's shirts, but you can see why they chose to display it as a muscle shirt. If you have ripped muscles like the model's, explaining that you now get your workouts on a job or at a gym, and play fantasy football, will get an appreciative chortle from muscle admirers. If you don't, explaining that your sport is fantasy football will get a sympathetic chuckle from just about anybody.
(There are dozens of "Fantasy Football Loser" shirt motifs, too, for those seeking sympathetic smiles. Among those who appreciate the element of chance in the sport, "Fantasy Football Champion," "Fantasy Football Commissioner," "Fantasy Football King/Queen," and similar motifs should also get smiles.)
For Fantasy Football Gals...
This designer also has a basic "Fantasy Football Chick" shirt, if you check out her Zazzle store. Something about the female symbol with the football in it just struck me as... "eye-opening." The fabulous thing about Zazzle shirts is that you can order them in any size, any style, and almost any color you can think of--cheaper or pricier, sleeveless, long-sleeved, to fit men, women, or children.
Fantasy football puts an I in "TEAM" for men too. The only reason why this design is listed "for women" is that the designer chose to offer it in women's (stretch-to-fit) sizes only. It's available in six sizes and twelve colors.
(Sexier "Fantasy Football Female" and "Fantasy Football Loser" shirts are out there. Some women think they're funny, and wear them...but probably not in public. An "I rosterbate after games" motif that really is funny, but might confuse and upset certain high school teachers, was not included in this list. This article considers only shirts that would not get a teenager sent home from school or banned from the mall.)
For Football Fans Everywhere...
"If you want me to listen to you, talk about sports." Fair warning to those who don't really want to talk to you, and a witty way to invite those who do. Movieshirtguy has designed other "If you want me to listen..." shirts too. These come in "unisex" sizes (six of them) in eighteen colors.
Just the basics about how to be a football fanatic...available in men's, women's, children's, and even maternity shirts, all sizes and lots of different colors (including camouflage). I like the basic black, standard-fitting man's style best but it's available in almost any style you can think of, including pajamas and a grill apron!