Title: Truly Tasteless Lawyer Jokes
Author:
“Blanche Knott”
Author tracked down to: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ashton_Applewhite (but this web site has not verified the claim made at that page, nor has Wikipedia)
Date:
1990
Publisher:
St. Martin’s
ISBN:
0-312-92226-4
Length:
121 pages
Quote:
“‘You see, Your Holiness,’ soothed St. Peter, ‘we have literally hundreds of
popes here in heaven—but Mr. O’Flaherty is the first lawyer we’ve had in
years’.”
“Blanche
Knott” was the fictitious compiler of a long series of short, cheap books of Truly Tasteless Jokes sold in big-chain
bookstores in the 1980s. In self-defense (which I realize is dangerous in
court…Aaack! This book’s getting to me!) I’ll say that I never actually bought
any of them. I acquired one from a friend who was briefly married to a Truly
Obnoxious lawyer. (Won’t mention his name, but although he still lives in Scott
County he’s known for talking about how much better he liked the part of
Virginia from which he came…so we know there must be a reason why he’s not gone
back there. Henrico County readers? You're welcome.)
“When the
lawyer died…he protested vehemently. ‘I’m…too young to die…I’m only forty-seven
years old!’…‘According to your time sheets, you’re ninety-six’.”
“The
Devil leaned forward and continued, ‘And in payment, all I would ask for is
your eternal soul. Think it over.’ The lawyer…considered…[and] finally
demanded, ‘What’s the catch?’”
“‘[Y]ou
don’t even know whether my client is living or dead?’ thundered the
lawyer…`Quite true,’ replied the doctor…‘His brain is in a jar on my desk in
the morgue, but the rest of him might well be out practicing law somewhere’.”
Etc. etc.
etc. If you are angry at a lawyer, it’s funny. (There used to be
collections of Truly Tasteless Jokes organized
around other targets; I think one was about all fifty United States, in
alphabetical order, two or three pages per State.) So you can have my copy of this book, cheap.
The “jokes” quoted here are merely mean. Further into the book they get obscene.
It is not
a Fair Trade Book. “Blanche Knott” obviously does not intend to be contacted
and, even more obviously, has no
charity. Nevertheless, if you want them, you can buy Truly Tasteless joke books here for the usual rate of $5 per book + $5 per package + $1 per online payment (and you could fit several of these books into one $5 package). Please send payments to either address at the very bottom of the screen.
No comments:
Post a Comment