Tuesday, January 8, 2013

How Not to Commit Suicide

Every now and then some despondent Washingtonian decides to leave a final message to the cruel city by throwing himself or herself in front of a Metro train...


...and I just have to say, I haaaate this practice. These people. If you'd told us your problems we might have been able to help you, but instead you're just mindlessly leaving us in the cold for hours while your carcass is scraped off the tracks?

I believe God will forgive people who euthanize themselves because they're convinced that they're dying anyway, but about the fools who deliberately plan to keep thousands of people from relying on trains that are supposed to run every three minutes, I don't know.